1940
Brother Raoul Molnar
5 November 1940 - 28 November 2011
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Born 5 November 1940 to Cecilia (Gerrity) and
Rudolph Molnar in Brooklyn NY
1955-1958 Marist Juniorate, Esopus, NY
1958-1960 St Joseph Novitiate, Tyngsboro, MA
1959
Reception of the Marist Habit, Tyngsboro, MA
1960
Profession of First Vows, Tyngsboro, MA
1960-1963 Marist College, Poughkeepsie NY (BA Biology)



1963_1975 Union Catholic HS, Scotch Plains NJ (Teacher,
Counselor)
1965
1975
1975
Profession of Perpetual Vows, Poughkeepsie NY
Iona College, New Rochelle, NY (MA Pastoral
Counseling)
Second Novitiate, Fribourg, Switzerland
1976_1997 Marist Hish School, Bayonne, NJ (Guidance
Counselor, Teacher)
1999
Profession of Vow of Stability, Maplewood, NJ
1997_2011 Roselle Catholic HS, Roselle, NJ
(Teacher/Guidance Counselor)
2011
2011
Died at Champagnat Hall, Bronx, NY on
November 28, 2011
Buried Marist Brothers Cemetery, Esopus NY
Eulogy by Brother John McDonnell, fms
On behalf of the Marist Brothers, of Brother Owen and the
Roselle Catholic community and of Raoul's brother Robert,
sister-in-law Arlene and the whole family, thanks for being here
this evening. Last August, when Raoul began to realize he was
dying, he asked me to say something at his Mass of Christian
Burial. But he was quick to remind me that a eulogy was a toast
-
not a roast. And he gave me two conditions: 1st, be brief.
And 2nd, be truthful -
but not TOO truthful! Even as he was
dying, Raoul could make me laugh.
How do you say goodbye to someone you love? Last night, as I
sat in our little community chapel, the question kept coming to
me: "What is God trying to tell us in the life and death of our



brother Raoul? What is our God saying to you and to me thru
Raoul?" A medieval legend has it that when Jesus preached His
Sermon on the Mount, he looked at a different disciple as He
pronounced each beatitude. And the disciple on whom he
focused was one who modeled that particular beatitude. When
He came to "Blessed are the single-hearted for they shall see
God," it is said that Jesus looked at Nathaniel. Now it was
Nathaniel, known as Bartholomew, who was the man without
guile - straight forward - a straight shooter - and oh-so-single-
hearted. I'm thinking tonight that Nathaniel will now find a soul
mate when he meets our brother Raoul - our beloved, simple,
straightforward, single-hearted friend.
When Alcoholics Anonymous celebrated its 50th anniversary, an
AA member wrote his doctoral dissertation on the history and
purpose of the organization; and he entitled it Not God (Not
God.) For me, the simplicity of that title captures the spirit of
our brother Raoul (who, just for the record, was NOT a member
of AA.) Raoul's life journey taught him humility as truth: Raoul
let God be God ... and he let you be you ... and me be me. He
accepted us just as we are. Raoul was who he was - gifted and
broken like all of us ... confident that His God loved him just the
way he was. That's why he was able to radiate such a rich
simplicity, a warm and welcoming straight-forwardness, an
uncomplicated and oh-so-positive way of living life, an upbeat
single-heartedness ... and a delightful sense of humor. Raoul was
a gentle man ... and a gentle giant of a Brother.
Raoul Joseph Molnar - or RAUL as his family calls him - was
born on November 5th, 1940 in Brooklyn, NY to Celi and Rudy
Molnar. He couldn't have had more loving parents. He and his
younger brother Robert grew up in a very happy home in
Queens Village, NY. He attended St. Gerard Elementary School
and was taught by the Sisters of Mercy. As a freshman at St.
Ann's Academy in Manhattan, he enjoyed and admired so much
the happy young men in black robes (with the white index
cards!) that he left home
&
joined the Marist Brothers


Formation program at the age of 14 -
51
%
sure that this was
what God wanted of him. (Some of you may have seen the
short film "Raoul Goes to the Juniorate" which the Brothers'
Vocation Director made that year.) So Raoul did his last 3 years
of high school at Marist Prep in Esopus, NY.
Raoul always insisted it wasn't so much the programs and
training of his 8 years in formation that carried him through. It
was his fun-loving, supportive young peers with whom he could
be himself and belly laugh a lot - the notorious "Group of '59!"
Slowly he came to realize - the shoe fit. Raoul and the Marist
Brothers were a match. And while growing into a community
lifestyle, a celibate chastity, a challenging obedience, he
confronted the human issues we all face. Raoul could be strong-
willed - sometimes stubborn. And he hated being in situations
beyond his control. These kept Raoul real - and grounded.
Eventually he came to believe with his whole heart that,
imperfect though he was, His God really did love him just as he
was. From then on, Raoul always said he never once doubted
his vocation in his 52 years as a Marist Brother.
Now I must confess - this is a shared eulogy. These past few
days, some of you shared with me - so eloquently, humorously,
lovingly, sometimes with tears in your eyes - the message God
has communicated to you thru Raoul. Permit me to share a few
of these:
I.
Never give up ... Don't be afraid!
You're all aware of Raoul's courage these past three years
amidst great pain
&
suffering as he battled cancer. But you may
not know that as a young man, studies didn't come easy to
him. So he worked twice as hard as his classmates at Marist
College and earned his Bachelor's degree in biology. He went on
to study geology at the University of Notre Dame and earned a
Master's degree in guidance and counseling at Iona College.


Raoul was a classroom teacher and guidance counselor at Union
Catholic HS in Scotch Plains for 12 years, then 21 years at
Marist HS in Bayonne. And finally, for the past 14 years at
Roselle Catholic HS. Except for six months off to do a Marist
spiritual renewal program in Fribourg, Switzerland and a year
serving as our province vocation director, he never left the
classroom or the guidance office. Very few Marist Brothers have
had a longer teaching career. And why was Raoul so successful
and loved by his students? Our Founder, St. Marcellin
Champagnat, taught us: "To educate students properly, you
must love them." That was Raoul's secret. How he loved you
students! And you knew it! Raoul saw with the eye of the heart
what was really important - his family and friends, his students
and their parents, the high school staff, his Marist Brothers. In
recent months, Dr. Heaney and the staff members at Sloane-
Kettering
&
nurse Veronica and the whole staff at Champagnat
Hall
&
Hospice who cared so well for him told me they have
rarely experienced a more patient patient - tell-it-like-it-is, Oh
Yes, but cooperative and gentle and funny. And last week as
Raoul lie dying, he said to me; "John, I'm not afraid to die. My
only concern is the pain I'm causing my family."
II. Raoul was a passionate man:
... and all his grandnephews and nieces. He was so proud of each
one of you. Raoul was passionate about his friends. Republican
or Democrat ... liberal or conservative ... it really didn't matter
that much to him. How often he'd humbly say: "Edmund you're
so intelligent. I can't believe you're my friend." "John Bantz,
you're so atha-letic. I can't believe you're my friend." "Phil
Robert, you're so spiritual, I can't believe you're my friend."
How he loved his many friends and told us so over and over
again. The Roselle Catholic faculty
&
staff
&
parents. His priest
friends. Often, he'd say: "Gotta hang up. The Cranford ladies
are coming." Raoul could make us laugh - and often he did just
that without even meaning to.


Raoul was passionate about hospitality. When I visited, I could
never get my coat off before he'd ask: "What can I get you?"
He loved a good party. He loved to cook. He loved to eat. And
he loved a "splash"- as his friend Br. Vincent Damian used to
call a cocktail. Raoul spent 21 summers in the Esopus Retreat
House kitchen - cooking each week for 100 to 150 kids - kids
with cancer, kids with AIDS, mentally-challenged kids, all sorts
of kids. Very often the temperature in that kitchen broke 100
degrees. And Raoul's recreation was reading the NY Times from
cover to cover each day or walking the Atlantic City boardwalk,
visiting what he liked to call "the shrines."" And how he loved to
tease you, Arlene - and to call Terry and Chrissy "Princess."
Raoul was passionate about his God. How often he'd say: "I
don't pray enough!" But he wouldn't dream of missing the
Divine Office and his meditation on each day's Mass readings.
Raoul spoke more openly than anyone I know about his
relationship with his God ... about his doubts and struggles, and
how God spoiled him rotten. Saturday afternoons, you'd find
him at the 3:30 Mass at Overlook Hospital in Summit (Saint
Overlook, he'd say!) carrying, of course, at least 3 prayer books
and missals under his arm. It was Raoul's faithfulness to prayer
and very positive outlook on life that fortified him to be a man
for others - doing ordinary things with extraordinary love:
Just shy of 50 years teaching and counseling high school
students. Mothers Club meetings
&
events year after year after
year. Working flea markets on Saturday mornings. Weekend
retreats in Esopus. Coordinating ACT, SAT, TOEFEL
examinations. Telephoning and looking in on shut-ins and the
hospitalized. Secretary at the Brothers' Provincial Chapters. The
list goes on and on. And - as you can see - I could go on and
on talking about my best Brother friend for the past 50 years.
Can't you just hear Raoul saying: "John, for God's sake -
enough already. These people need to get home!" So I'll end
with a few lines from a letter written to Brother Raoul in recent
days by a former student of his. You can check out tributes and



memories from other students on Facebook.
"Dear Brother Raoul, What can I say about the impact you had
on me and our Roselle Catholic community? I always remember
how so many people enjoyed your cooking, and all the girls said
how cute you were. I remember how you were always willing to
lend a hand when others needed help. You helped me get so
much stronger, Brother. Your constant smile, your cheerful
personality and, simply, your humanness, always found its way
into my heart. We have so many memories that I cherish Br.
Raoul - be it the time I nearly ran over you in the hallway, or
sitting down and talking with you about all sorts of things, or
watching you act silly to keep your class interesting, or your
funny responses to a less-than-attentive student: "What - are
you on meth?!" "Sweet, Jesus!" I'm so grateful I got to know
you, Brother Raoul. I hope to be able to be like you someday.
Every time I go running with my brother, we offer a prayer, and
I never fail to think of you - always praying for us students. I
know that you're now in a safe and peaceful place and that you
know the beauty of God's plan. There's a line from "Les Mis:"
"When we meet someone we love, we see the face of God."
Thanks for that, Brother." And the student signed his name.
How do you say goodbye to someone you love? Gonna miss you
Raoul - big time! Rest in peace, Saint Raoul. You've earned it.
- Br. John McDonnell, F. M .S.
Most recent edition 11 December 2011. Information and photo obtained from the Marist
Brothers web site in Rome, Italy. On 10 December, eulogy taken from the Marist
Brothers website http://www.maristbr.com/